What's A Great Community Member Look Like?

People need to do more listening than talking. Try reading everything before making ignorant comments. I know that people want to be heard, but I am tired of all the mental masterbation and bullshit comments that have started littering this place. It hurts me to say this but I don’t like this place much anymore. I read the content of the authors, and a select few of the members, but as a whole the average IQ around here has dropped. I know it sounds negative but in my opinion a good commenter these days is someone who is willing to just shut the hell up.

I read the same crap over and over and over again. It’s crap that doesn’t need to be reviewed. The fact that we are still having this convo pisses me off. We had a very constructive piece on this and yet commenters are still banging on the same stupid issues. This community seems to be more like couples counseling than Cougar sports these days. Can we just get over it? Please!

Also in the shut the hell up catagory is ignorant comments. Don’t talk just to hear yourself talk. If you don’t have an informed, well thought out point to make, then don’t make a comment. Because someone smarter than you is/has made your point in a more compelling way. Think before you speak, please, because drudging through a bunch of crap to try and find nuggets of info that are worth reading becomes tiresome.

All in all I would just ask that people take the time to read. Inform youselves before you open your mouth. If you feel the need to vommit verbally, do it in a diary or find a “message board.” This place used to have a standard, now it’s become one of the most disappointing parts of my day.

To the authors I have nothing but repsect. To the OG’s around here, much love. To the rest of you I’ll say this; If you don’t like what I’ve said I really don’t give a damn. I’m basically one foot out the door because this place has been over run by a bunch of hacks that dribble poop out of their mouths when they should be listening to some of the smarter people that comment here. There are many that bring a lot of great things to this site, and they know who they are. If you are not sure if you are on of those people then you’re probably a prime candidate to shut the hell up and listen.

Coming on here and ranting about rants is a paradox. Sorry you feel as though the posters aren’t as good as ‘the old days’, but claiming to praise the authors while complaining that they are ‘banging on the same stupid issues’ is a paradox. You came on here to complain about people vomiting all over while you vomited all over them… that is a paradox.

Not everyone will be knowledgable- not everyone will know the difference between a poorly executed hedge on the hardcourt and a poorly trimmed hedge in the court yard… but lecturing them and bitching at them for that lack of knowledge serves nothing and no one.they just want to Go Cougs with fellow Cougs… I say we let them.

This is a great site for information about a shared passion- some just come here because they root. Some come because they feel they can lend expertise, some come just to vent. It is a social forum for discourse… the point of Nusser’s attempts is to try to make it as pleasant and non confrontational as possible. If you are not sure where you are in this aspect of the conversation… perhaps you are a prime candidate to read and learn – not shut up mind you- or leave- just maybe read and learn. Nuss and the fine authors of this site attempt to steer this Coug ship to smoother waters for we readers, so as to be better able to moderate the ‘dribble poop’ that you describe. If you don’t feel you have anything to lend to the current discussion… don’t lend it. Empathy is a great tool— I enjoy your posts most of the time Jo-Jo- losing you would be a loss to the site… but calm down a notch man… this is a good faith effort by Nuss to avoid making folks feel unwanted and uncomfortable— just not sure how that is at all a bad thing.

I have been here quite a while and I have recently fell victim to an occasional ludicrous debate. It wasn’t even about an issue, it was a misunderstanding. I am not happy that I have let myself get sucked in that, that is not CougCenter. I am pissed off at myself and I apologize to those who have been around hear a while, because you know that is not my style. I have thought about walking away from CougCenter many times, but I love this site.

What happened to tact? I am tired of people thinking they are being attacked when someone replies to their post. I am also tired of people attacking the authors. Instead of asking you why you pointed something out about their post, they attack you, like you are the problem. When most likely it could just be a context issue, tone/text, wording or just framing their point of view wrong or even the reader misunderstanding the person’s point of view wrong. I have noticed this a lot in the last 6 months. I can’t remember this happening in the 2-1/2 years prior to that.

People don’t always express themselves correctly because most of us are not professional writers, which is okay, it is still fun to see other people’s perspectives even though we aren’t professionals. I for one don’t always express myself perfectly and I know it, so I try not to jump down someone’s throat when they respond to my post. If people could be more humble and less sensitive it would make it a lot easier. Instead of using sincerity and thinking why someone responded, people just get defensive.

I have come to understand if someone in life can’t agree to disagree it is usually because they are insecure in their own beliefs (but there are a few exceptions that are just haughty). Not everyone is going to agree and you can learn to see others points of view, without have to change your view. Ask someone why they responded a certain way, maybe you will both learn something.

Maybe new members have to wait a month after they sign up, so they can read and get a understanding of the site. Maybe catch onto memes and how people operate. It took me months before I decided to sign up.

I think a CougCenter member should understand they are dealing with fellow Cougars and we are all on the same side. Also, remember that we are talking about college kids and people jobs (Coaches) who this is their livelihood. It is okay to analyze, not attack. Try to write like that person might read it. Could you imagine if someone was dissecting your every move at work and bad mouthing you? I know they make good money, but that still doesn’t warrant it. What are they suppose to do? Quit the job they love because they make good money. They haven’t asked for it, they are just doing their job.

This is special and close community and I hope we can grow and keep it that way.

some restating, others new(ish).

1) A good commenter/community member tries to bring something new to the discussion. Whether its building on something someone else has said (pointing out other examples), or offering evidence to refute it. Obviously game threads move very fast, so the “rules” are a little more loose there.

2) Be respectful. Kinda speaks for itself. Those of us that have been posting for a while understand each other’s humor, but noobs may not. Which leads me to:

3) Don’t take it personally. If someone disagrees with your comment or point (even if they’re disagreeable about it), don’t take it as if they’ve impregnated your girlfriend while you were out of town. Rather than responding in kind, try to diffuse the situation, rather than escalate it.

4) Use the “Rec” button. If someone makes a point that explains your thoughts better than you can, you don’t need to rehash it. If you HAVE to post something, a simple “well said” or “rec’d” goes a long way.

5) If you’re not sure of the argument the poster/author is making, ask. Don’t just start disagreeing or calling them out.

6) ENJOY THE SITE! In other words, if it gets heated, or there seems to be a lot of dunderheads posting and you’re not having fun/being educated, stop reading the thread. Come back tomorrow. I found myself having similar feelings to JoJo, because I had to go through and read every thread, every comment, and chime in on them all. In the early days, that was easy to do. Now, with the bigger community, theres a lot to wade through to get to the good stuff. You can see where a thread is going. If you don’t like it, don’t keep going. Come back in a couple days and the comments worth reading are already rec’d for you.

1. and #3 are very wise. ESPECIALLY #3.
   Oh, and #6 as well.
   I try to think of this site as a place where I talk to fellow Cougs. Be it a dorm room a million years ago, or at a bar, or at a game, or wherever. It’s very much a matter of respect. When you type, maybe think – “would I say this to someone to his/her face?” If yes, would I really use those words? And then step back a moment and think about it again. It only takes a matter of seconds.
   And to agree with SoCalCoug, you don’t have to be a professional writer. Just have some guidelines. TiltingRight’s #2 (I laughed as I typed that – I have the mind of a 12 year old) sounds like the “good commenter” Golden Rule. Respect.
   Go Cougs!

1. Brings something new to the table
2. doesn’t unnecessarily attack other commenters
3.doesn’t beat a dead horse
4. follows the community guidelines (obviously)
5. (here’s the biggie, and I’m trying to demonstrate it in this comment) IS CONCISE. Don’t post an entire paragraph for a thought that can fit into one sentence! I get bored when reading paragraph comments.