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NCAA outlaws humans, robots to play college football by 2011

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This writer's estimation as to what college football games will look like beginning in 2011. via <a href="http://mcgonnigle.files.wordpress.com/2008/12/footvib.jpg">mcgonnigle.files.wordpress.com</a>
This writer's estimation as to what college football games will look like beginning in 2011. via mcgonnigle.files.wordpress.com

In a stunning move today, the NCAA rules comittee approved a new rule that will begin phasing out human beings in college football for the 2010 season and require each member school to field teams made entirely of football-playing robots by the year 2011.

The NCAA defended the landmark decision in a statement released early Thursday:

We at the NCAA feel that emotions and personality have become too prevalent among the student-athlete population. Despite our past efforts including penalties for celebration, smiling, and "running too fast," constant displays of individuality and excitement continue to occur in each and every NCAA football game. We felt the only logical remaining step to protect the purity of our beloved sport was to remove the human element altogether.

The new state-of-the-art football playing robots will be unable to show any feelings and have been specifically programmed not to dance, high-step, point, or toss footballs over their shoulders. We are also excited about the parity this will bring. College football fans should be thrilled.

In reaction to this, Cougar head coach Paul Wulff has put out a call to all current and former WSU engineering students who have specific talents in the area of robot construction and repair.

Click the jump to learn more.

Okay, so maybe we won't see robots playing college football any time soon. However, the NCAA has passed some new rules that include banning any messages in eye black and opening up the possibility of disallowing a touchdown for taunting. Awesome.