Pac-12 Football odds and picks: The Gamble-Tron, Week 10

Welcome back. What an odd week it was in Pac-12 football. It didn’t start out that way, as Utah went into Pasadena and hammered UCLA, as most expected them to do. Well, as any non-moron expected them to do, anyway. The next day? That was a tad different, as all five underdogs covered the spread won outright! Can you remember that happening in recent history? I certainly can’t. This is where someone points out to me that it happened less than a year ago.

WSU we could see happening, as the wrong team was favored. USC was playing a third-string quarterback, so that wasn’t totally out of the question. Outside of that, did anyone see Arizona beating Oregon at all, let alone by four(!!!) touchdowns? Cal winning without the offense finding the endzone? The Pac-12’s worst team going to Colorado and leaving with a win? How on earth is anyone supposed to foresee any of this? Oh yeah, we can’t.

Once again, it was another week, another .500ish record.

Why I’m a genius: Friday night Twitter! Though not taking BC on the money line displayed a tad of cowardice.

May have only finished one game above .500, but luckily, once again, the big bets came through.

The Cougs gave me some tense moments from a gambling standpoint. And a fan standpoint. And a heart health standpoint. All’s well that ends with five years taken off your life. There was something about Washington that just didn’t feel right. Turns out it’s the...coach? And the former Pac-12 Offensive Player of the Year? That award may have been the jokiest joke that ever joked a joke.

Houston Cougars! I’ll tell you what, D’Eriq King is a damn stud. Their defense is a garbage barge without Ed Oliver, but the offense murdered a vastly overrated USF team. Speaking of murders, my God Utah State, the only thing left of New Mexico is some hair and bone fragments. Iowa State had me sweating quite a bit, particularly because they dropped an estimated eleventy billion passes, but luckily they came through down the stretch.

Why ties still suck: Look, I should know better than to take one of America’s worst teams. But UConn was playing another of America’s worst teams, and led 17-9 in the fourth quarter. Did I mention they were getting five points? UGH. If I’m being honest, I was lucky to come out of the Iowa-Penn State game with a push. Iowa should’ve won the game.

Why I’m an idiot: Saturday Twitter!

The toughest one to take was Notre Dame. 27-0 lead at halftime, then decided they were being too mean to the seamen.

I realized as I tuned in to Utah-UCLA that I hadn’t seen one second of UCLA football this year. As the game ended, I was sad that I’d finally seen UCLA football this year. I honestly have no idea what I’m supposed to think about Colorado’s bed-wetting. The first score I saw was 31-3, and I thought it was an easy win. Then it was 31-10, then 31-17, then...forget it. Losers.

The USC picked was looking good, then it was looking terrible, then it was possibly looking good again, then N’Keal Harry stuck his foot up USC’s ass and we were a loser, again. Oregon isn’t worth a mention, as they didn’t even get on the plane. But can they be blamed for not wanting to go to Tucson? I say no. So anyway Aaron Feld is still a douchebag.

Last week: 8-7-2 / $630

Season Total: 65-58-6

Cash Balance: $9,380

Reader Results:

• .:R: 4-3 / $470
• MyHopesareAsinine: 1-0 / $910
• Keith_Clark_: 4-2 / $180 - Giving you credit for OSU even though you wrote the spread incorrectly
• BothwaysUphill: 2-4-1 / -$240
• wsubrady27: 5-4-1 / $60
• ThaiCoug: 3-4-1 / -$360
• ginandthompson: 5-1 / $490
• CSU2022: 0-1 / - everything
• stewak: 0-6 / -$660
• CougarCottage: 4-2 / $1,390
• 425CougFan: 2-3 / -$60

Colorado (+3.5/-110) at Arizona (-3.5/-110): Raise your hand if, three weeks ago, you thought Arizona would be favored in this game. If your hand is up, you’re a liar. After what’s happened over the last couple weeks, everything points to Arizona. I think Arizona will win. They’re rolling!

The Pick: $110 on Colorado

Cal (+11/-110) at WSU (-11/-110): This is a tough one. If genius Chris Petersen doesn’t pull Jake Browning, Cal probably loses and this line is around 14. That points to value on the WSU side. Then again, if WSU loses a tight one to Stanford, this line is seven or less. So what to do? Look, I know nobody can figure this sport out week to week, let alone year to year, but WSU was a 17-point favorite against Cal last year, and they lost by like 78. I think the Cougs win, but I don’t think it’ll be easy.

The Pick: $110 on Cal

Utah (-7.5/-110) at ASU (+7.5/-110): This is still ASU’s dead cat bounce season, and the highest bounce came in LA. But let’s give Herm and the team credit from ending USC’s 19-game home winning streak. I think ASU is going to lose this game, and since they lose every game by seven, give me that hook!

The Pick: $110 on Sparky

UCLA (+8/-110) at Oregon (-8/-110): This game went from “lots of intrigue in Eugene” to “both of these teams are terrible so who cares?” in the span of a couple hours. There is some juice here, mostly because Chuck Kelly is returning to the only place he’s ever won much of anything. This game went from Oregon -13 to Oregon -8 very quickly, undoubtedly due to the iffy condition of their two best offensive players, Justin Herbert and Dillon Mitchell. In one day, this line went from eight to 10. I’m going with the Ducks.

The Pick: $110 on Oregon

USC (-15/-110) at OSU (+15/-110): Looks like J.T. Daniels is back in the lineup this week, so the Hail Marys will be coming early and often in Corvallis. There is a bit of palace intrigue, as dead man walking Clay Helton committed the last act of a desperate coach when he fired an assistant and announced that he’s taking over play calling duties. Even though terrible things have happened to Team Trojan when they’ve visited Corvallis in the past, I get the feeling the Beavs have been celebrating that Colorado win all week.

The Pick: $110 on USC and $220 Over 60.5

Stanford (+10/-110) at Washington (-10/-110): This line is a mystery. After watching Washington’s offense last week, how on earth is Washington giving 10 points to any team not named Oregon State? Yes, their defense is really good, but that offense is ghastly, and I’m being generous! I know Stanford’s defense isn’t any good, but still. Bryce Love is on one leg, but I think if David Shaw continues the “spray and pray” offense, the Cardinal can keep it close. Plus, Husky Stadium is going to be a mausoleum. But yeah, great fans.

The Pick: $110 on Stanford and $220 on Under 47

Houston (-13.5/-110) at SMU (+13.5/-110): Houston is my new UCF, but Lord help me if Ed Oliver is out again.

The Pick: $330 on the Coogs

Nebraska (+17.5/-110) at Ohio State (-17.5/-110): This opened north of 21 and has dropped by a full field goal. The public must be really impressed with that resounding Husker victory over powerhouse Bethune Cookman. The Buckeyes are coming off a bye, and I get the feeling they want to make a statement.

The Pick: $330 on Ohio State

Iowa State (-14/-110) at Kansas (+14/-110): This line would be at least four points higher if TCU hadn’t given the game away in Lawrence.

The Pick: $220 on Cy

Texas A&M (+4.5/-110) at Auburn (-4.5/-110): Yeah, I know A&M is coming off a tough road game, and they’re going on the road again. And yeah, I know Auburn is coming off a bye. I also know Auburn isn’t very good.

The Pick: $110 on A&M