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Pac-12 Football Odds and Picks: The Gamble-Tron, Week Infinity

Winter Weather Oracle Punxsutawney Phil Makes Annual Groundhogs Day Appearance Photo by Jeff Swensen/Getty Images

Greetings and salutations. I don’t know about you, but here at Gamble-Tron Headquarters, we are gosh darn sick and tired of waking up to another round of postponements and cancelations around college football. Seems like every day there’s a rash of scheduled games that are no longer scheduled, leaving teams either out in the cold or scrambling to find a new opponent (hey there, Cal and UCLA). As of this draft, we’ve already lost 14 games!

Like much of life since mid-March, college football seems to be caught in an endless cycle of scheduled events that are either re-scheduled or nixed altogether. But we choose to look on the bright side here, and given the fact that college football itself teetered on the brink a short time ago, we’re just happy that there are still games to be played, point spreads to be confused by and bad beats to be had. Praise be.

Why I’m a genius: Twitter! For once! Most of the time our Twitter picks turn a winning weekend into a loser. Last Saturday was a rare and welcome exception.

Woulda been nice to know the Louisville Cardinals were going to declare some very key players out a short time later! Oh well. That Miami game paid off big time, as we took the ‘Canes on the money line (+110) and doubled up on winners with the under.

Why I’m an idiot: Um, did you see that Michigan Wolverines pick at the top of the list? Would love to have that back! Michigan and Jim Harbaugh need to find a way to engineer a graceful parting of ways. It isn’t working. I also thought Stanford was at least a touchdown better than Colorado. Next thing we knew, it was 28-9 Buffs and the rout was on.

Last Week: 8-6

Season Total: 21-21-1

On to this week.

Not playing: Arizona State Sun Devils and Colorado Buffaloes

Given the state of things in Tempe, we may not see ASU for several weeks.

UCLA Bruins at Oregon Ducks (-13.5): The return of Charles Kelly to the place where he was actually able to coach a winning team! Seems so long ago. Much like when Chipster was coaching the Ducks, the road team will leave on the wrong end of an ass-kiccking. Special thanks to UCLA for deflating this line with that beatdown of Cal.

The Pick: Oregon

USC Trojans (-2.5) at Utah Utes: Being a USC fan these days must kinda suck. Sure, you’re 2-0, but you needed two straight miracles to beat teams with inferior talent, while your squad full of four-and-five stars did little more than pretend to be tough and rack up penalties. Still, the Utes haven’t played a game, and even Kedon Slovis and his bum shoulder should be able to pull this one out.

The Pick: USC

Arizona Wildcats at Washington Huskies (-11.5): Nice to see Jimmy Lake peacocking around Montlake this week after that resounding and referee-assisted win over perennial doormat Oregon State. Then he doubled down by preaching about how he was going to win championships by running the ball. Memo to Jimmy: You’re not a good enough coach or a good enough recruiter to win anything more than a mid-level bowl with that philosophy. Hell, even Nick Saban realized he needed to evolve. So please, keep it up!

The Pick: Arizona

California Golden Bears (-3.5) at Oregon State Beavers: I’d make this the lock of the century if it weren’t for Tristan Gebbia. Cal looked predictably awful while making its debut at 9 a.m. on a Sunday. The most surprising thing we saw our of Cal was the ineptitude of Chase Garbers. This is a tough one, so we’ll take the home team and the points.

The Pick: Beavs

Washington State Cougars at Stanford Cardinal (-2.5): Pretty big sign that the odds-makers aren’t buying WSU just yet, as they’re underdogs to a Stanford team that got beaten down in Eugene and boatraced at home by Ralphie. Not sure what it’s gonna take for the fine folks at the casino to understand that David Shaw is the Pete Carroll of college football, still living off success that isn’t even visible in the rearview mirror anymore.

The Pick: Cougs

Mississippi State Bulldogs at Georgia Bulldogs (-25) / Total 44: This is a truly breathtaking set of odds. UGa is a 25-point favorite and the total is under 45. That. Is. Amazing.

The Pick: Nope, not going anywhere near this one.

Kansas State Wildcats at Iowa State Cyclones (-12.5): Iowa State is in the driver’s seat to take a spot in the Big 12 title game, but I think the Wildcats are good enough to keep this close.

The Pick: KSU

Oklahoma State Cowboys at Oklahoma Sooners (-7): Bedlam! I know I’ve said it before, but if you think the Apple Cup series is one-sided, have a look at this “rivalry” where Oklahoma leads 89-18! They’ve won 15 of 17! There have also been seven ties. Boomer.

The Pick: Sooners

We also jumped on a few Big Ten openers (wish we’d snagged Cincinnati as well!).

We will almost certainly be back with more tenuous picks on Saturday. In the meantime, Jeff, Nick and I are all above .500 in our TallySight picks! Surely this will continue, right? RIGHT??!! Happy gambling.