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Pac 12 Schools New Year’s Resolutions

Or, what I assume they’d be.

COLLEGE FOOTBALL: SEP 17 Eastern Michigan at Arizona State Photo by Kevin Abele/Icon Sportswire via Getty Images

Good afternoon, Coug fans!

Before we start, I just want to express my condolences and sympathies again to the University of Idaho community. As many of you might have seen, a suspect is finally in custody. This can obviously stir up a lot of emotions for many people, and in the event that you or a loved one needs any extra help, there are resources here. Or, in a more generalized sense, reach out to loved ones (or me!), times like these require community. It’s not lost on me how close this hits to our community as well.

There is simply no easy transition from that to jokes. But we shall try.

Here is what I assume, if each schools football program was personified, the New Year’s Resolutions would be for the Pac-12. Again I am still including USC/UCLA because they aren’t out the door yet! Stuck with us a little longer.

Oregon State University
Finally get the nation-wide clout they deserve.

University of Oregon
Win a competitive football game by a margin of more than 2 points.

Go to a bowl game.

Win more than three games.

Washington State
Run less screen passes (please I am begging you).

University of Washington
Not lose humiliatingly to an Arizona school (I actually hope they don’t follow this).

Leave the Pac-12. Oh wait!

Leave the Pac-12. Oh wait!

Be able to be distinguished from Colorado State.

Win the Rose Bowl (this counts since the game is on January 2nd).

Arizona State
Stop bouncing between going either 8-5, or under 3 wins.

Nab an impressive quarterback.

Please take this with a grain of salt! I hope everyone is gearing up to have a safe and happy New Year!! Remember to drink water too. Go Cougs!