In the spirit of the upcoming $1.3 billion Powerball jackpot, let's play a fun hypothetical game: If you won a billion dollars, what would you do for WSU? Build new sports facilities? Make the history department the best in the world? Something far less noble?
For me, I'd start with basketball because I love having a good basketball team. Whatever needs to be done to make the Cougs have the best basketball facilities and the best dang basketball coach, I'll throw money at it. And there would definitely be many things named after myself and pets (Baxter's Beer of the Game Presents Craig Powers Court at Boycat Pavilion sounds alright). And also, the beer served in the club section at football games will be better. A lot better.
I polled the CougCenter authors, and their answers are sorted into divisions below. Let us know what you'd do in the comments.
The Cougar Calf Eliminator Division
Michael Preston: Chairlifts for students. One up B street, one up from the bottom of the hill behind Sloan, and one from Rogers.
Gavin Porter: I would do a couple of things. First off all, I'd buy a fleet of Cougar Hummer limos that run from 9 p.m. to 3 a.m. that would be free for students to use, put Denny's back in business (and spruce it up), and lastly buy Husky Stadium and deck the whole thing out in Cougar colors and logos.
The Phil Knight Division
PJ Kendall: I would instantly become WSU's version of Phil Knight. Need an indoor facility? Done. Need someone to buy naming rights to Martin? Enjoy the game at Youporn Stadium! I'd save a couple million each for my kids when they turn 35 or 40, but other than that, and the fact that I would absolutely never work again, the Cougs would have a blank check. Anytime WSU needs anything, just make a call. Hell, I'll even buy them a plane for recruiting trips.
But no way am I paying for maintenance. I'm not gonna be nickel-dimed to death.
Scott Cresswell: Upgrade basketball and baseball facilities to the best in Pac 12.
The Bag Man Divison
CougCenter does not endorse illicit activity and/or anything that would cause WSU to further lose its innocence. This is just for funsies.
Brian Anderson: I would open an offshore bank account, using a resident I pay to trust, with $50 million. This will fund the bag-man network I spend the next year establishing stateside. Oh and the IPF construction would break ground the next day.
Kyle Sherwood:I'd buy the most elaborate network of bagmen this side of the Kremlin. Then bankroll an A-List movie studio to produce the biopic where we all get caught. We would cheat hard and cheat better than anyone who's ever cheated.
And you won't care. Because you got your picture taken with the trophy. They'll vacate our string of nattys but they can't vacate our memories. After that I suppose I'll have to invest in considerable plastic surgery because the school will probably have to sign something that says I'm not allowed into the stadium anymore.
The Shameless Self-Promotion Division
Jeff Nusser: CougCenter.com Stadium has a nice ring to it.