Media days can be a little bit of a grind for the participants, and WSU coach Mike Leach appears to have a strategy for combating the doldrums: Say and do as little as possible related to actual football.
I mean really — how many times can you say "we’re happy to be here" and "we’re excited for the season" and "we feel real good about our chances"? And the assembled media (which is just as bored), is all too willing to play along with Leach and his shenanigans.
Like, for example, when Leach was asked about the latest craze sweeping the nation, Pokemon Go:
This is Mike Leach trying to understand Pokemon Go: (it's better without audio) pic.twitter.com/HJY7ZhWR8S— Chantel Jennings (@ChantelJennings) July 14, 2016
I mean, this video could work for you in so many contexts.
"Hey Mike, did you hear the Pac-12 media voted UW second in the North? ......... No really, they did."
One reporter figured they’d just play right into Leach’s distaste for dumb questions — really a brilliant strategy, actually.
Q: What's the one question you hate to answer most at media days?
MIKE LEACH: Well, let me think about this. There's a lot. You know, the whole milestone question stuff. Well, you know, your team did this, it did that, and what does that say, and like everybody is just going to relax, you know, like everybody is -- okay, well, we beat that team, so forget the fact we're playing somebody next week. Now we don't have to do anything. Now all we have to do is just sit here, yeah, yeah, yeah, my, my, my.
You know, I don't know where the media thinks we have time to do all that stuff, you know. Heck, you think that win was fun, the next one might be fun, too, but you've got to invest kind of the time and effort. There's all these -- and you can even just get the goofy like kind of pose in your mind that they're imagining, well, doesn't it feel good, doesn't it mean that you've accomplished this, and he made such a great play, and you did such a good job coaching and your staff.
And you're just going, oh, it just feels so good, because now we don't have to do anything. Oh, man, isn't -- let's run through memory lane again. Oh, let's do it some more. I mean, when does everybody got the time to do this? And the thing is even if you get old and start messing with your grandchildren, you only have time to do it a little bit. I mean, I don't know when this happy little space exists, but I mean, this is a business about scratching and clawing, and you're constantly trying to improve and get better and better.
From the front row, it looked like this:
Don’t worry, we went ahead and made a GIF of the best part for you to save to your computer for future use the next time someone says "45-10 BAYBEEEEE!!!!!":
It’s also important to keep Leach and the players entertained while waiting to go on TV with the Pac-12 Network guys:
The players got to do some talking, too, although a lot of what they had to say came away from cameras. Seattle-area radio personality Dave "Softy" Mahler scored an interview with Gabe Marks, and as Gabe is wont to do, he let Mr. Mahler — a noted Husky fan — know exactly where he stood:
Here at P12 media day. Gabe Marks told me I'm not Cougar material. Told him I'd rather be on the 45-10 side.— Dave Softy Mahler (@Softykjr) July 14, 2016
"We only like a specific brand of guy, you're way too big city for us." -Gabe to Softy.— Michael Preston (@RM_Preston) July 14, 2016
"We don't want you dude. You guys like your purple thing, that's cool."— Michael Preston (@RM_Preston) July 14, 2016
PLEASE NEVER LEAVE ME, GABE
"You can always come get your crash course on Cougar love and you can find a place in our home."— Michael Preston (@RM_Preston) July 14, 2016
Gabe....Gabe...you handsome SOB.
You can listen to it all right here:
Sadly, Parker Henry — the third member of WSU’s contingent — didn’t seem to contribute much in the way of fun, although he did get to toss a football to Gabe (which would seem to be pretty fun):
Although Gabe talked about Parker:
Gabe Marks on teammate Parker Henry: "His arms are getting bigger. His hair is perfect. Look at those khakis, dude. I love those khakis."— Christian Caple (@ChristianCaple) July 14, 2016
Who cares, anyway. Parker Henry is a man of action. We all know where he’d rather be:
And lastly, this isn’t funny, but it is pretty neat — enjoy this 360-degree picture of the WSU trio: